Currently Unnamed
by Major Trouble
Summary: Trouble's uncle, who he didn't know about, was an important man. Now Captains Short & Kelp have been assigned to captured the fairy who killed him... but first Root tells them the impossible. H/T. 'Currently Unnamed' is what it's called. My first fanfic.
1. I Hate You

**A/N: My first fanfic! I wanted to write one, so I decided to. 385 words without A/N's. I need help with the title and 'adventure' part, so please think about that while you read. Thanks!**

LEPrecon Captain Holly Short sprinted down the back roads, trying to be on time for once. She skidded around the corner –and ran smack into Trouble Kelp.

"D'Arvit!' she swore

Trouble turned around. "Holly? What're you doing?"

"Trying to be on time for once, what else?" she growled, not in the mood to talk.

"You're shift doesn't start for another half an hour. Wouldn't you rather_ not_ run into Chix?"

Holly looked at him, then at her moonometer. "According to this, I'm almost late. D'Arvit, it needs a new battery." She sighed. "Oh well, I guess I have time to grab a nettle smoothie, then."

"I'll come with you, if you don't mind. My shift starts when yours does."

They walked to a small café near Police Plaza, and bought two nettle smoothies, which they drank as they walked slowly to work.

When they got there, Trouble looked at his monometer. Holly looked at hers. It was off by exactly have an hour. Trouble looked up and smiled. "Right on time."

Walking to their cubicles, they went right by Commander Root's office.

"SHORT! KELP! GET IN HERE!"

Trouble and Holly looked at each other.

"What'd we do?" they said in unison, then burst out laughing.

"SHORT! KELP!"

They stopped laughing as they covered their ears, and then cautiously walked into their commander's office.

"You're both half an hour late. Give me your moonometers!"

The two younger elves silently took the aforementioned moonometers off their wrists and handed them to Root.

He read Trouble's, then Holly's. His face could have boiled tar.

"Kelp, you need a new battery. Short, yours is right on time. What're your excuses?

Holly started "This morning-", right as Trouble said, "Last night-"

They looked at each other and blushed, knowing what rumors would start to circulate, and what Root was thinking.

"I don't care what you two did last night or this morning, as long as you concentrate and GET HERE ON TIME!" Root bellowed.

As they left the office, Holly turned to Trouble, muttered, "I hate you," and proceeded to smack him upside the head.

Captain Trouble Kelp winced.

**A/N: I'm gonna put up the next chapters soon as I can, until I have the first three up. I'm not a patient person, at all. I need help, though. I need a mission to send Holly and/or Trouble on. Something for the story to revolve around, other than the relationship. Constructive critism is appreciated.**


	2. The Betting Begins

**A/N: 744 words. Sorry I didn't get this up right away, I meant to. But I have good excuses if anyone cares :)**

**Disclaimer: (Forgot last time) I don't own the characters. Eoin Colfer does. He also owns the song.**

**Thanks for the reviews. Didn't really expect any...**

Many people had why Trouble Kelp's cheek was red, and frankly, he was getting tired of it. Especially since the reason was that he got slapped by a girl.

Of course, everyone in the LEP though Trouble and Holly were secretly dating. So when Chix saws Recon's only female slap Captain Kelp, he took this as his chance to, well, annoy her, but that's not what he thought he was doing. He though it he was being irresistible. Actually, he wasn't really either. More, unintentionally funny, in a stupid way.

His first chance came at lunchtime. Holly was sitting alone, being one of the first fairies to the cafeteria. Without getting a lunch, Chix flew over to her and landed gently on the seat next to her. Or rather, he tried to land gently. Instead, he landed half on, half off, the seat, and fell over. Holly looked at him and laughed.

Chix got and said to Holly, "See? If I can make you laugh, you _must_ be in love with me!"

By now, the Kelp brothers had come in and gotten their food. Not sure if she was still mad about that morning, Trouble hesitantly sat down next to Holly.

"What's a matter, Trub? You look like you think I'm gonna eat you for lunch, instead of this salad," she said, gesturing to the food in front of her.

Trouble instantly relaxed, before he realized what she had said.

"It's Trouble, not Trub. I get enough of that from him, -" here he jerked his thumb at Grub next to him "-I don't need it from you, too."

Holly grinned. "Oops, I guess it slipped out."

Trouble wasn't fooled.

* * *

Foaly looked up from the security cameras to Root and Vinyaya.

"So, do you think they're dating?"

"You didn't hear about this morning, did you, Foaly?" Root asked, and filled the centaur in.

* * *

Trouble finished his lunch and looked at Holly. _My god is she beautiful, _he thought. _No! She's just a friend, nothing more._ Still, he couldn't help but think about her, and notice all her habits. As she stood up, he thought, _and now she'll run her hand through her hair…_ Which she did, just like she did every day.

Ash Vein slapped him.

"Ouch!"

Ash smirked. "Wimp."

"It was just surprise, not actual pain. You'd say ouch too."

"Sure I would."

Five minutes later, Trouble smacked Ash.

"Ouch!" he exclaimed. "…Oh."

Trouble grinned and walked towards Holly's cubicle.

* * *

Foaly went over the bets with Commanders Root and Vinyaya.

"Okay, this is how it is. If Trouble and Holly are publicly dating within the week, you each owe me 10 ingots. If they're publicly dating sometime between next Monday, when Week 1 is over, and the Monday after that, Julius and I-"

"DON'T CALL ME JULIUS, CIVILIAN!"

"-owe Vinyaya 20 ingots each, and if Trouble brings her to the fancy new Italian restaurant by Friday, Vinyaya and I owe Julius-"

"What'd I tell you about CALLING ME JULIUS!" It was a statement, not a question.

"-50 ingots each. Got it?"

The Commanders nodded, Root rather red-faced, as usual.

Suddenly Foaly heard "If It Looks Like a Dwarf, and Smells Like a Dwarf, Then It's Probably a Dwarf (Or a Latrine Wearing Dungarees)" on the radio and started singing along.

"_When I got an itch I can't scratch,_

_When there's a slug in my vole stew,_

_When I got sunburn on my bald patch,_

_That's when I remember you…"_

Root and Vinyaya left the Ops Booth rather quickly after that.

* * *

"Hey Holls," Trouble said, walking into her cubicle. Holly would have protested the nickname had she not known it was payback for earlier. She almost did anyway.

"Hey, what's up?"

"Oh, not much… the ceiling, miles of rock, human civilizations, the sky, the moon. You know, the usual."

"I meant as in 'how are you' or 'why are you here,' or 'what'd you want.'"

"Oh I know," Trouble assured her with a grin. "I just wanted to say hi and give you something."

"More e-forms?" Holly smirked. He'd been used as delivery boy for Root more than once.

"No… this."

Trouble leant in and kissed her on the lips.


	3. Repeat

**Disclaimer: I don't own the characters. They belong to Eoin Colfer. Please R&R! (822 words or something)**

Of course, if Trouble had known he'd end up with a black eye the next day, he probably wouldn't have done it. Then again, being a Recon jock, maybe he would.

Fortunately, no one actually saw him kiss her, or Holly punch him in the face. So he made up a story: he walked up behind Holly, said hello, and she whipped around and punched him in the face, before she saw who it was. Holly was perfectly fine with this cover story.

In the Ops Booth, Foaly called Holly at her 'office.'

"What, Foaly?"

"Hi Holly. How's your day?"

"Did you seriously just call to say hi? I have _way _to many e-forms for casual chats."

"Actually, I wanted to know what you did to Trouble. He has a black eye. Root made him ice it to make the swelling go down- Trouble's out of magic and refuses to let someone fix it for him. He's to stubborn."

"He walked up behind me," Holly reported. "I didn't notice until he said hello. But he said it weird. I didn't know it was him, and he scared the –censored- out of me. So I punched him in the face. I'm just glad it wasn't Root. Wait, he's out of magic? If Root saw him, why didn't he yell at him for it?"

"God only knows Holly."

"Whatever, listen, I have to go. E-forms, you know?"

"Alright, see you later."

"Later gater." Holly hung up and looked at the stack of e-forms. She was saved having to do them- temporarily, at least- by a knock on the cubicle wall. She stood on her chair and looked over the wall at Captain Vein in the next cubicle.

"Yeah?"

"Hey Holly," Ash said. "You got as many e-forms as me?" he asked, indicating a swaying stack.

Holly was amazed. "I have about half that much! And I thought _I _had a lot!"

"Lucky," he grumbled. "Well, I better get started. Talk to you later, Holly."

"Yeah, later."

Holly sat down again and started filling out useless e-forms about god knows what.

Suddenly her phone rang again, and Holly realized she had fallen asleep. She picked up her head and noticed an e-form was stuck to her cheek. Peeling it off, she answered the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey Holly. It's Trouble."

"Oh."

"Can I come by your apartment after work?"

"That's in… about 15 minutes. Finally. No action what so ever today. Oh, sorry. Um… sure, I guess."

Trouble noticed the reluctance in her voice, and it worried him. Normally Holly would say yes without a second thought. When Trouble bothered to call, that is. Usually he just showed up.

"Okay, I'll be over a little later than that, I want to change. Half an hour?"

"'Kay. I'll see you then.

Holly got home and immediately changed into some casual jeans and a t-shirt, like she did every day.

Exactly 30 minutes and 21 seconds after he hung up, Trouble knocked on Holly's door (he must have gotten his moonometer a new battery). Holly opened the door to see him standing in black jeans, a plain black t-shirt hidden beneath an equally plain black jacket, and black combat boots, which he removed to reveal, surprise surprise, black socks. Holly snorted.

"What?"

"Two things," she told him. "One, my apartment is a pigsty. Don't worry about your boots. And two, got enough black? I think it's something to do with LEPretrieval One. I think you think it makes you special. Or are you just trying to match your eye?"

Trouble blushed. "It doesn't make me special, it's a color. And I took my boots off because it's more comfortable. You don't have shoes on, either."

Of course, he had worn the black to try and impress her, by making himself look tough.

"Whatever. You want something?"

Again, this worried Trouble. She usually went to the kitchen and got something to eat or drink, leaving him to do the same.

"No, I can't stay long. I just have to say on thing- about what happened at work yesterday." Holly glanced at his black eye "I wanted to say sorry. That was stupid of me. I got carried away, I guess, thinking you liked me like that. I shouldn't have done it, I-"

"Trouble."

"-was being stupid, I really shouldn't-"

"_Trouble._"

"-have done it-"

"TROUBLE KELP!"

This shut him up.

"I get it," Holly told him. "And you just keep repeating yourself. You're not… nervous, are you?"

Trouble blushed.

Holly grinned.

"You are."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am-"

He was cut off as Holly pressed her lips to his own. Shocked, Trouble closed his eyes and deepened the kiss and wrapped his arms around her.

Eventually they pulled away, but still Trouble held Holly close. She rested her head on his chest and said but one word.

"Oops."

Again, Trouble wasn't fooled.

**A/N: I have something shaping up for the rest of the story. It envolves a bomb, I think. Maybe. And some uncle Trouble never knew he had. It's kinda stupid, though. Oh well.**


	4. LIM

**A/N: So... yeah.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Eoin Colfer. I do own LIM and LEOL, though I ripped of the names from AIM and AOL.**

"10 ingots they kiss before going to their cubicles by Monday morning."

"30 they show up together today."

"100 ingots they _never_ go out because Holly's in love with _me_."

The last bet was, obviously, placed by none other than Chix Verbil himself. Everyone quickly shook his hand on that one.

"20 ingots that-" the gnome stopped and immediately started talking about the latest crunchball game between Haven and Atlantis with the pixie next to him. This was, of course, because Holly and Trouble had walked into the room.

As they walked through they said hi to some of their co-workers. Once they left, coins started changing hands.

"Did you notice they got really quite as we walked in, then started talking again?" Holly wondered,

"Yup," Trouble answered. "They're betting certain things will happen between us. Chix bet 100 ingots we'll _never _date 'cause you're in love with him. I guarantee everyone in the room- 30 or more people- shook on that one. Poor Chix, he'll be broke."

"Are you saying we're going out, Trouble Kelp?" Holly teased.

"What? No! I just meant that you don't like him!" Trouble replied quickly. Perhaps to quickly. He was nervous again. Of course, that was a good thing last time.

"How d'you know that, anyway?"

"I could hear them through the door while I was waiting for you."

"I meant how d'you know I don't like him, but I was kidding. What'd you want to bet- figuratively- Foaly started this?" Holly challenged.

"10,000 ingots- figuratively."

"I guess I next time I should leave out the 'figuratively' part," Holly sighed.

"I figure you should." Trouble couldn't resist teasing Holly.

"Shut up, Trubs."

"Trouble. Not Trub, or Trubs. Trouble. T-R-O-U-B-L-E. Trouble."

"You in a spelling bee, there, Trub?" Holly questioned.

Trouble would have viciously kicked a daisy, had there been one to kick. Instead he just growled in response.

"Well, I gotta go. E-forms, I fell asleep yesterday. You're call woke me up."

"Oops, sorry," Trouble joked. He knew Holly was actually glad, because if Root had found her… "At least Root didn't catch you."

"Root didn't catch her what, Captain Kelp?" Of course, this was Julius. Just don't call him that to his face. Yeah, the bright read one. Easy to find, isn't he?

Anyway…

"Uhh… umm…" Trouble stammered.

"Sleeping, sir. I fell asleep yesterday filling out e-forms. Captain Kelp's phone call woke me up," Holly revealed.

"I'd ask why he called, but I don't think I wanna know. I'd also punish you, but then I'd have to punish myself, and every fairy in the force, except _Corporal_ Kelp. Just don't do it again, Short," Root said.

"Oh no, sir, I won't."

Root grunted. "Yeah. Right."

After watching Root go back to his office, Trouble and Holly parted ways. Let's follow Trouble today, shall we?

* * *

When Trouble got to his cubicle, he booted up his laptop, signed on to LIM (LEOL (Lower Elements On-Line) Instant Messenger), and started to fill out e-forms. A minute later, his computer beeped.

**Captain Vein:** hey

**Captain Kelp:** hey. whats goin on

**Captain Vein:** not much, you

**Captain Kelp:** i heard your betting session this morning

**Captain Vein: **d'arvit

**Captain Vein has signed off.**

Trouble said, "Off to tell everyone, or at least Foaly, no doubt."

He was right.

* * *

Ash Vein signed off LIM and sprinted to the Ops Booth.

"Foaly! Trouble heard a bunch of us betting this morning! Now what?"

Foaly snorted. "Now nothing. Just see what happens."

"Oh, okay," said Ash, feeling stupid for overreacting again.

* * *

Trouble had half his forms done when his computer beeped again.

**Corporal Kelp:** hey trubs

Grub was at home, sick.

**Captain Kelp: **trouble

**Corporal Kelp:** w/e. you kiss holly yet

**Captain Kelp:** why would I kiss a xmas decoration

**Corporal Kelp:** holly short. duh

**Captain Kelp:** even if I had, its not your business. butt out

**Corporal Kelp: **but mommy said to keep an eye on you

**Captain Kelp: **i don't care what mommy said. shut up

**Captain Kelp has signed off.**

"Ugh."

"Grub again?"

It was Holly, framed in the doorway. _My god… _Trouble thought. _She's perfect._ Then he realized she was talking to him. "Huh? What? Sorry, I spaced out."

"I know, that's what I was trying to tell you."

"Oh, sorry. Any particular reason you came, or did you just wanna… talk, or something?" They both knew that's not what he was going to say, but that he'd realized how awkward what he _did _want to say would sound.

"Root wanted me to-"

"SHORT! KELP! HURRY UP!"

"-bring you to his office."


	5. Tree

**A/N: Yay! 1,300+ words. And they actually do something other than sit around the office all day! Oh, in the story it is Wednesday, so you know (remember the bets). Review, please!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any characters apart from Tree.**

"You two are going topside to find a pixie known only as 'Tree.' Why that's his name, no one knows. You know pixies, they're tiny. But he's got no visa, and likely has a softnose on him, though Foaly tells me 'we can't be sure.' You both running hot?" Root asked, looking straight at Holly. Getting two nods (Trouble had preformed the Ritual the night before), he continued. "Good. Get in a shuttle at E1: Tara. Bump someone if you have to- this is important, and frankly, I don't care about civilians." (Gee, what a surprise) "Go armed, and make sure you get Hummingbirds. You'll need the best out there, and with Koboi gone, that's them."

"I want you to knock him out, tag him, and bring him back here. Dump him in a cell and fill out the paperwork. Oh, and have Foaly give you a moonbelt, Captain Kelp. Maybe there's a reason the guy's name is Tree. Got it?"

"Yes sir, Commander," Trouble replied.

"Yes sir," Holly said.

"Good. Dismissed."

In the Ops Booth, Foaly gave them all their, equipment, spending five to ten minutes explaining each piece, including the moonbelt and Neutrino 2000, which every officer in the force knew all about. I won't bore you with the details; let's just say it took a _very_ long time.

"Foaly, just shut up!" yelled Trouble.

Foaly, looking hurt, stopped his lecture on the new locater, which now included a moonometer. Everything else was exactly the same, but he had to tell them every little detail anyway, the paranoid guy.

"We need to get going. D'Arvit, we should have left fifteen minutes ago!"

"I was ju-"

Foaly was cut off by a carrot that was shoved unceremoniously down his throat, courtesy of Captain Trouble Kelp.

"Come on, Holls."

"Holly."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Let's go," Trouble kidded.

"Okay, Trubs," Holly shot back.

"Shut up, Grub."

"That's just insulting."

"Sorry, it was." He meant it, too.

They walked the rest of the way to the shuttle port in silence. Commandant Terryl got them set up on the next flight to the surface more quickly than would be expected. He hadn't forgotten his last run-in with the crazy girly captain.

"Excuse me, sir. I need to get on that shuttle." Holly poked the large pixie in the back when he didn't answer. So much for being polite. He turned around and glared down at her.

"No, you don't."

"Yes, I do. My companion and I are on official LEP business. Move."

"Searching for Tree?"

"Ye-" Trouble hit her from behind, making it look like he had tripped on his own feet. Holly landed flat on her stomach with Trouble on her back. He helped her up, then grinned sheepishly at her. "Sorry."

"So, you _are _looking for Tree, then?"

"Yes," Trouble answered gravely. The fact that he answered truthfully told Holly he hadn't made it _look_ like he had tripped on his own feet, he really had. Poor guy. "I think I found him, too." He looked at the mug shot on his helmet visor. Yup, definitely Tree. Wasn't he supposed to be on the surface? Why'd he come back?

Holly had noticed what Trouble had, and quickly zapped him with her buzz baton. She didn't have time to go for her gun. Trouble did, as Tree turned on Holly, rubbing his forearm where she had hit him. However, Trouble noticed right before he was going to shoot, Tree had a softnose laser pointed at Holly's head. Stalemate.

"We've reached an impasse. You shoot her, I'll shoot you. But if you shoot me, she'll zap you're head, effectively killing you. Yes, those batons are powerful, aren't they?" Trouble was stalling for time.

Tree pulled the trigger.

Nothing happened.

Tree's softnose, like those of the B'wa Kell, had been adapted to take Mud Man batteries. His battery was done, and he didn't have any fresh ones on him. He was holding a useless would-be murder weapon. So Trouble shot him.

Tree dropped rather like a sack of stink worms. Why anyone would ever want a sack of stink worms, I don't know. But Tree dropped like one.

That is to say, he wiggled. The setting on the captain's gun hadn't been high enough. A smack from Captain Short's buzz baton stilled him.

Trouble zipped the cuffs onto Tree as Holly tagged him with a seeker-sleeper. Then came the hard task of dragging the huge pixie back to the Prisoner Transport Vehicle outside, carefully. _That_ was the hard part. They clipped him onto Trouble's moonbelt, and carried him to the PTV outside.

"So, how's it going, Trouble?" Holly asked as Trouble drove back to Police Plaza.

"Well, not that great. Last night, I found out some uncle I never knew I had died, and I'm being forced by Mum to go to the recycling ceremony. Apparently he was some important guy in Atlantis, and she just wants the publicity, but of course she didn't say that. So I won't be here next week unless I get lucky enough to be sent on a mission that last long enough for me to miss it."

"Yuck. That really sucks, you don't even know who he was?" Holly inquired.

"Nope, just that he lived in Atlantis and was important. Oh, wait. I also know he was murdered. Maybe in Haven, I wasn't really listening."

"As long as I don't have to play detective. I'm all for arresting the guy, but not finding out who he is."

"Same here. But if he _was _murdered in Haven, it's our job to clean it up."

"Maybe Foaly can tell us something when we get back."

"We _are_ back, Holly," Trouble laughed.

Holly looked around. "Oh."

Sure enough, they were back at Police Plaza. Trouble dragged Tree out of the back of the PTV and shot him again in the chest, for he had stirred. Then he trudged up the stairs, yanking on the pixies arms. Trouble hadn't realized before just how big the pixie was. Tree was about 3 ¾ feet (3', 9") tall and probably weighed twice as much as Root. And Root's a decent sized guy.

Holly followed Trouble towards the corporal waiting for them inside. Corporal Newt. Poor guy always gets the worst jobs. He told the two captains Root wanted them in the Ops Booth and that he was supposed to take Tree. Trouble took off his moonbelt and cinched it around Newt's waist.

"Trust me, you'll want it," he told him.

"Thanks."

Trouble nodded in acknowledgement and followed Holly to the Ops Booth.

Holly slapped the door. "Foaly!"

Foaly opened the door, replying, "Some a Julius rubbin' off on ya, Holly."

Surprisingly, Root paid Foaly no comment. He did ask why they got back so fast, though.

"Tree was in the shuttle port," Trouble reported.

"No firefight?"

"No, no nothing. Almost, though." Trouble tossed the prisoner's softnose on a table. "But why'd you want us?"

"Well, Holly, Trouble. Go home. Rest. You'll need the energy, I'm sure. And please, actually fall asleep. Don't throw a party or something."

Holly and Trouble were surprised, to say the least. Root hadn't even raised his voice. His face was, for once, a pale pink. Was something wrong?

They left the Ops Booth, heading outside.

"I'm so tired, I barely slept last night," Trouble complained. "Grub was up all night, puking into his trash can. D'Arvit, it'll be the same tonight."

"You can come to my apartment if you want," Holly offered. "I'd always wanted bunk beds when I was young, so when I got my own place, I got bunk beds too. Never got rid of 'em."

"You sure?"

"Sure I'm sure."

"Thanks Holly!" Trouble exclaimed. They started walking to her apartment.

"Yeah, no-" Holly yawned loudly, then stumbled. Trouble caught her by the arm and wrapped her in a bear hug so she stayed upright. "I guess you need some sleep too," he said, looking down at her. "C'mon, let's get you home."

"-problem," Holly finished.


	6. The Shocking Truth

**A/N: Hopefully, I'll get a chance to write the next couple of chapters soon- this is as far as the story goes right now.**

**3 chapters today, because, as I said, I'm not a patient person. I'll pretty much post chapters ASAP.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters except the second-to-last person mentioned. You'll know who I mean. No, don't scroll down to see it now! Wait 'til you get there!**

Holly woke up the next morning, Thursday, at- she looked at her clock- 7. She was about to get out of bed when she realized she wasn't alone. What the heck? Then she remembered. Trouble had come to her house to avoid a sick Grub. In the middle of the night, she had gotten cold, so Trouble all but dragged her off the top bunk, both elves half-asleep.

However, that soon changed. Once Holly was in Trouble's arms, both of their hearts started beating unnaturally fast. And, being so close, they felt each others heartbeat against their own. Did they blush? Of course they blushed!

Then Trouble laid Holly down on the bottom bunk and crawled in next to her, pulling the blankets up around them and putting his arms around her. Apparently she had either wiggled free in her sleep, or he had let go in his, because she had woken up on the other side of the bed from him, free from his arms and body heat. She was cold again, so instead of getting dressed she moved in close to him.

"Good morning Holly," Trouble whispered in her ear, snaking his arms around her waist.

Holly jumped. "I didn't know you were awake, Trubs."

"Obviously." He pulled he closer and she obediently snuggled against him, her back against his chest. They lay like that for quite some time. Holly fell asleep again. Trouble might have, too.

Eventually, Trouble thought to look at the clock. "D'arvit," he said, waking Holly up from her light sleep.

"What, Trubs?" Holly asked, turning to look at him.

"We gotta get up." He rolled off the bed and landed on all fours, then got up and helped Holly up. He pulled on his LEP suit (he'd worn boxers to bed, having gone straight from work to Holly's place) and kissed Holly on the cheek. "I'll be in the kitchen, Holls."

Holly got dressed in her own suit, then went and brushed her teeth. _D'Arvit, I need a shower, too, _she thought. _But I don't have time. Oh well._

She bolted into the kitchen and grabbed a nettle smoothie from the fridge. She saw Trouble had already taken on, so she grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the apartment. They walked silently.

"Are we going out, Trouble?" Holly asked suddenly, about half way to work. Not that it was far from her apartment.

"I guess so. Are you okay with that?"

"Why wouldn't I be, Trub?"

He gestured to his right eye. He'd healed it when he did the Ritual before the Tree mission.

Holly laughed. "Oh. Right."

Suddenly she realized she was still holding Trouble's hand.

"Do you think Root'll be mad when he finds out? It could distract us from our jobs, he'll say."

"I think he'll be furious. He's Root, it's what he does. Let's make it worse, why don't we? What're you doing tomorrow night?"

"Sounds to me like I'm going to dinner with you. Did I guess right?"

"Yeah. The new Italian restaurant on Elm Street?" Trouble asked.

"I hear that place is amazing," Holly said.

"I'll pick you up at 6, okay?"

"Perfect."

They reached Police Plaza still holding hands. As they walked in, a lot of people whistled. Trouble grinned, but Holly blushed. By now everyone knew that the two knew about the bets, so they wasted no time crowding around Chix Verbil, trying to get their ingots before he ran out. Needless to say, he wasn't a happy sprite.

"Short. Kelp."

Once again, Root's face was rather pale (for him at least) and he sounded tired. He looked at their hands, but didn't comment.

* * *

In the Ops Booth, Foaly and Vinyaya helped Commander Root explain.

"Trouble, your uncle was killed the other day," Vinyaya stated. "You never knew him. But now you have the job of figuring how to capture his murderer. Holly, you're going to help him. Commander Root just wants you two because you've faced this man before."

Seeing the confused looks on the young elves faces, Root answered the unspoken question. "Holly, Trouble. It was my brother, Turnball. He escaped. Big surprise, right? He used a bio-bomb to kill your uncle, Trouble. Did your mum tell you his name?"

Trouble shook his head.

"His name was Marcus Root. My younger brother. You're my son, Trouble."

**A/N: Yes, Marcus is the one I own.**


	7. Explanations

**A/N: 1,200+ words. Second longest chapter. Explains everything for you. Yes, I'm aware Root is out of character. But think about it. Who wouldn't act like he does? He wants Trouble to understand and forgive him. Ask if you have anymore questions. Can't update tomorrow. Maybe another update today, maybe not. Thanks for the reviews!**

**Disaclaimer: I do not own anybody except Marcus Root. Everyone else belongs to Eoin Colfer. Australia belongs to... I don't know who. But you get the point.**

Trouble stared at his commanding officer for a full minute. No one moved or spoke. Then Trouble burst out laughing.

"It's July, Commander. April Fools Day was three months ago. My dad is dead. Died trying to contain a troll. You're not him."

Root tried not to show how much this last comment stung him. "Have you never wondered why your mom has no pictures of your dad? Why she avoids questions about him? Why all you know, or think you know, is that he was killed by a troll? He wasn't, Trouble. He's sitting here, in front of you. Me, I'm your dad."

"Yeah? If that's true," Trouble countered, "then why didn't you tell me, or Grub? Huh? Why keep us in the dark? Why lie to us? Why not raise us? Or are you only my dad, and not his? Is my mum a slut?"

"No, Trouble, listen to me. Think about it. If everyone knew I was your dad, then when you joined the LEP, everything positive I did or said to you would be labeled as favoritism. That goes for Grub, too- he's my son, too, just like you. Please, don't tell him though. I'd like to tell him myself."

Although Trouble was still mad the Commander hadn't told him this before, he had to admit it made sense. But wait a minute…

"Then where does the name Kelp come from?"

"That's your mothers name. Her maiden name."

"So I got my mum's name so I wouldn't know you were my dad?" Trouble asked.

"No. You got her name because we were never married."

"Why not?" Trouble wanted to know.

"Things came up in my family life. I saw her again about 20 years later. Grub was conceived. I never saw her alone again. Yes, I saw her, but usually you were with her, or else someone else was. When I found out she was pregnant with Grub, I felt terrible about it. I sent your family money every month to help make payments. Once you and Grub moved out, I just sent the money to your mother. She sent some on to you, did she not?"

"Yeah. She always sends some money top help with the rent on our apartment. I wondered where she got it."

"That was my money, Trouble. Money I earned here," Root told him. "I'll start sending it straight to you, now that you know where it comes from."

"No, Commander. You don't need to."

"Still Commander, eh?"

"Huh? Oh. You want me to call you dad?"

"Julius works, too. I'm not a very good father, am I?"

Everyone in the room gasped. They seriously gasped. Root actually giving someone permission to call him Julius? His son, maybe, but still.

"We're at work. So you should be Commander still." The truth was that Trouble still had trouble (no pun intended) thinking of Root as 'dad.'

"Doesn't matter. Just call me Commander in front of the Council, or we're in trouble, no pun intended. Otherwise, call me Julius, or dad if you prefer."

"So… you're my dad. My uncles, Turnball and Marcus. Turnball killed the later. You never married my mum because of family problems, hence my name is Trouble Kelp, not Trouble Root. You saw my mum again 20 years later, now I have a brother. Every month you send us money to help with our bills. And you've kept all this secret so no one could say anything about favoritism. Right?"

"Sounds about," Root replied.

"Holy –censored-"

There was a pause, a bit of an awkward one.

"So, what're we doing? What's our mission, Commander?" Holly asked, shattering the silence.

"You need to find Turnball. Knock him out god. We'll throw him in Howler's Peak, maximum security. We don't have a choice, the Council is making me."

"Wait- why'd he kill Marcus, anyway?" Trouble asked his dad.

"Because Marcus helped me capture Turnball originally. He wanted revenge No doubt he'll try to kill me next. Your job is to not give him the chance He's currently residing on the surface, in Australia. Fortunately, it's his house, and seeing as he's a fairy, that means we don't need permission to enter it."

"We?"

"Did I not mention I was going?" Root asked Holly, who had spoken.

"Before you were talking about it like just Trouble and I were going. And you said our job was to not give him a chance to kill you. If you come with us, you'll be doing just that."

"She's got a point, Commander," Vinyaya said.

"Besides, if you go, who will throw out all Grub's complaints? Or do you actually read all those?" Foaly threw in.

"No, I throw them out. Fine, I'll stay."

"Thanks," the other four chorused.

Root grunted. "Foaly, get Holly and Trouble some helmets, Hummingbirds, locators, and Neutrinos. Oh, and buzz batons for good measure."

Foaly got the equipment as he asked for it and handed everything to the two captains.

"We'll send you up in a shuttle, and you can fly across to Australia in it. It'll be faster than bringing you to Australia underground, and sending you up from there. Now go. I'll be watching everything from here," Root informed them, tapping a screen.

Trouble and Holly nodded and followed Vinyaya and Foaly outside, switching on their helmet cameras. The screen Root had tapped split in half, showing Holly's camera on the right and Trouble's on the left. There were sensors in their helmets- the screens would switch if Holly moved to Trouble's left or Trouble to Holly's right, so long as they were within 200 miles of each other. Root only knew which was which because it said 'CAPTAIN HOLLY SHORT' on the bottom of Holly's screen, and 'CAPTAIN TROUBLE KELP' on the bottom of Trouble's.

But before Trouble had taken two steps out of the Ops Booth, Root called him back. "Trouble, wait a minute." He then gestured to Holly to keep going, which she reluctantly did. Glancing at the cameras images, Trouble was looking at him and the screens. Holly was looking at Vinyaya and Foaly's backs. Judging by the slight jump in the screen, she was jogging.

Root turned around and stood up right in front of Trouble. Awkwardly, he hugged him. Then he let go and held Trouble by the shoulders at arms length.

"I'm sorry, Trouble. For everything. But please know, it wasn't a two-night stand or anything, you, then Grub. I loved your mother. I still do. We'd been dating for three years when you were conceived. I left when you were two, about 20 years ago now. You weren't an accident, and to answer your question from earlier- no, your mom is not a slut. She's the woman I love. Tell her that, will you?"

"Yeah, I will."

"Thank you. Now get going."

Trouble nodded and turned to leave. Once again, Root stopped him.

"One more thing. You couldn't have picked a better girl. Treat Holly right, not like how I treated your mom."

Trouble nodded again. "Okay, dad," he said, the title feeling strange on his tongue.

"That'a boy. Now go."

Trouble turned and sprinted after the others.


	8. Turnball's Back

**A/N: Last update till Tuesday, at best. Tomorrow I have a triple-graduation party, and a bridal shower, to go to. I'm leaving today, it's all up at my family's (extended, it belongs to my grandmother) lake house. Why did I even tell you that? Why did you even read it?**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters. They belong to Eoin Colfer.**

Trouble boarded the shuttle behind Holy, perfectly happy to let her fly. He had to much to think about.

_Commander Julius Root is my dad. But my mom isn't nearly as old as him. What the heck? I wonder if the Comma- my dad is telling Grub right now. I wish he could have told Grub when he told me. Grub's sixty, the age Holly was when she _lost _her dad. And now he's _finding _his? So I was about 20 years old when Grub was conceived. But I don't remember Root ever coming over. Not until I was about 30, when he started to have an interest in me, and wanted me to join the LEP. I'd always thought my dad had walked out on us (me and my mom), come back one night (Grub) and died right before Grub was born. Now I know the real reason Root came over so much. I didn't think it was normal for a Commander to come to a kid's house just because he wanted him in the force._

"Trouble?" Holly said aloud. "Are you okay?"

He looked up and saw Holly standing in front of him. They had reached the surface, so she'd put the shuttle on autopilot and gone into the passenger area to talk to Trouble.

"Trouble?" Holly asked again as she sat down next to him.

"Yeah, I'm fine," he answered.

"No, you're not," Holly replied, putting her head on his shoulder. "You've been crying."

Trouble hadn't noticed it until she pointed it out, but she was right. He'd been crying. He wrapped his arms around Holly and kissed the top of her head. "How do you think Grub will take the news?"

"I think he'll feint," Holly said.

"I almost did, so, yeah, he probably will." Trouble smiled, picturing Grub and Root- no, dad- in _his dad's_ office. He had no idea he was picturing it exactly how it happened, as it happened.

How long the sat there, neither was quite sure. But eventually Holly said, "I better go see where we are." Then from her seat in the cockpit, "We're almost there. We're gonna land real close to his house."

"Be careful, Holly. This isn't a common criminal, just like he told you. He's got landmines all around the property. I'm sending a scan of the place to the shuttle, and the pulsing orange things are landmines and other things that go ka-boom." This, of course, was not Trouble, but the LEP's technical wizard, Foaly. "If you hit one, you and Trouble won't live through, no way. You'll be little bits and pieces, just like the shuttle."

"Cheering thought," said Trouble, striding into the cockpit.

* * *

Down below, Root couldn't help but notice how often Trouble's camera was pointed at Holly. Being so close to landing, both had their helmets back on. Foaly and the Commander had seen the passenger area through Trouble's camera (from Root's office, where he and Foaly told Grub he was looking at his dad), which he had put down facing himself, although he didn't know it. They'd also heard the exchange through ear pieces, so Grub wouldn't hear anything. Just as Foaly had been about to make a smart comment to the two elves, right after Grub feinted, Root slapped him.

"If you say one thing to them right now, I'll slash your budget. In half."

Foaly shut up.

* * *

Back on the surface, Holly landed the shuttle on a tennis court, the only place big enough to land a shuttle on without landing on an explosive. Apart from the swimming pool, but what idiot would land a shuttle there?

Holly grabbed her buzz baton and gun before stepping out into the sunlight. Trouble did the same. Before the went anywhere, though…

"Good morning, captains. Ah, Captain Short. Good job on your initiation. Never even got tagged. I have no doubt this little adventure will not end well for you, or your friend here, Captain Kelp."

"Oh gods. Turnball Root," Trouble said, using the same line he had used on his first encounter with the ex-captain, although this time he was expecting to see him.

"Yes, the man with his own page in the 'Criminally Insane' section. Turnball's back, and this time, neither of you will live. I have a very painful method of killing planned, especially for you, my dear nephew."


	9. Captured

**A/N: 1,091 words. Happy reading!**

**Disclaimer: All characters mentioned in this chapter belong to Eoin Colfer.**

Nephew? Turnball knew. That could only mean….

"Yes, I know we're related, dear Trouble. That makes my plan that much easier. Kill you. Revenge on my brother. Simple. Perhaps I'll even give you a sporting chance. So, are you ready to die?"

"We won't go easy, Turnball. If we die, we'll go down fighting," Holly challenged.

"Such brave talk."

A dwarf came out from behind a tree just then and shot Holly, right in the gut. At the same time, a wingless sprite stood up inside a bush and shot Trouble.

The two elves fell to the ground, Trouble's helmeted head landing on Holly's stomach.

"Bring them inside!" Turnball ordered Bobb and Unix, for of course it was they.

The two dragged the unconscious LEP officers into the house.

"We'll send Retrieval up after them. Knock out Turnball and the others, bring 'em down, throw 'em in Howler's Peak. Simple," Foaly told the commander.

"No. Not simple. That's just what he wants. Their cameras are still active- we can see what's happening even though they're unconscious. He'd sabotage the equipment or set off a jammer, or _something_ if he didn't want us to know what's going on. Don't do anything."

"Commander, don't you think he'll think of you thinking that? Send Retrieval One. Put someone in for Capt- your son. He won't expect you to actually send them." This was Wing Commander Vinyaya, who'd heard the conversation upon entering the Ops Booth. "He'll expect you not to send them."

"My brother may be an idiotic criminal, but he's not stupid," Root disagreed. "It's a 50/50 chance we'll send them. He's gonna be ready for either. We need something else."

The trio thought about it for a while.

"I got it!" shouted Vinyaya.

Holly awoke and sat up before looking around. She was in a cement room with bars for the front wall and door. A cell. There was a toilet and sink in one corner. She was sitting on a twin bed (the same as a human one, but scaled down to fairy size) in the dead center of the room. It had a very thin mattress, no sheets or blankets, and one thin pillow that was actually thicker than the mattress. Trouble was just sitting up on her right, in the same bed. The only bed.

"Hey Trubs. How do we get out of here? What should we do?"

Trouble's head shot around to Holly so fast he cracked his neck, loudly.

"Ah!" He collapsed on the bed, rubbing his neck.

"Oh, sorry. Are you okay?" Holly asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine, I just didn't know you were there. When you wake up in a cell, you don't normally expect to be with the person you got captured with," Trouble replied. "But I'm very glad I am," he added, smiling softly.

Holly kissed him on the cheek. "Me too."

Then, "He left all our gear. Suppose it probably doesn't work, though," Holly noted, looking into the corner to her right and behind her (the toilet and sink were to her left and behind her).

"Let's find out," Trouble said, rolling off the bed and walking over. He picked up each piece one at a time, inspecting everything. He checked the helmets last. Holly sat on the edge of the bed, watching him. Had she been with anyone else, she would have occupied herself some other way, most likely checking the equipment herself. But Trouble was unique. Eventually he looked up.

"Everything looks fine," he told Holly.

"Yeah, but you didn't actually try anything. Should we?"

"We could try the helmets and buzz batons. The Neutrinos could easily be tampered with. We'll take them if we escape, but we won't test them, not on each other. Do you mind if I buzz you?" Trouble asked, holding up a buzz baton.

Holly stood and walked over to where he was sitting. "Go ahead," she urged, offering her left arm.

Trouble looked at her arm, then at her.

"You're smarter than most officers," he remarked. "This way, if there's any permanent damage, you can still shot a gun."

"Duh."

Trouble smirked, then zapped her arm.

Holly waited a minute, said, "It's fine. Toss me my helmet."

Trouble did, then jammed his own onto his head and set up a link to Police Plaza.

"What the-"

"What, Trubs?"

"I managed to establish a link with Foaly in Police Plaza. Turnball didn't seem to touch our equipment, other than to take it off us." Then to Foaly, "Set Holly up." Next, he made a gesture to Captain Short, meaning, "Go soundproof. No need for anyone to know what we're talking about."

Holly sealed off her helmet.

"Foaly, what's the situation?"

"Not even a hi?"

"_Hi _Foaly."

"Better. So, how's your day?"

"Foaly, my day would be much better if you would answer my original question. Now."

"Touchy," Foaly commented. "The situation is tricky. Turnball's probably ready for us to send retrieval, because it's procedure. But retrieval's ace, Captain Kelp-" Here Trouble raised his hand, forcing Holly to stifle a giggle. "-is one of the trapped faeries. So we don't want to send them. But, he's probably also prepared for us not to send them, because he thinks we'll think he'll want us to. So we have to do something else."

"Wait, what'd you say?" Holly asked, confused.

"He said that Turnball could be expecting us to send retrieval, but he could be expecting us not to. He's probably ready for either, so we need a new plan. Something different," Commander Root said. He was much calmer these days. Must be something his doctor did. Or he could be scared for his son's life. Well, maybe you should ask him.

"Oh. So what are we going to do?"

"Vinyaya has a plan. Commander?"

The Wing Commander came onto the screens on Holly and Trouble's visors.

"My plan, it's risky. And you probably won't want to do it. So I've got two. Which do you want to hear, the one you'll like better, or the one that'll _work_ better?"

"The one I'll like better," the captured elves said in perfect, unpracticed unison.

"Okay. This is what you have to do."

**A/N: Haha. Sorry.**


	10. Bathroom, Please!

**A/N: At 329 words, this is the shortest chapter yet.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in this story. Eoin Colfer does, and I am not Eoin Colfer.**

"Hey! Bobb!" Trouble shouted. "I need to go to the bathroom!"

Bobb was essential to the plan. Even though Unix _looked _dumb, they weren't sure. Bobb, however, they _knew _was quite stupid. Perfect.

As he sauntered down the hallway, Bobb hollered back. "You've got a toilet in there!"

"It's clogged! C'mon, I have to go real bad!" Trouble did his best to sound whiny and annoying.

"Fine, fine," Bobb muttered, fishing around in his pocket for the right key. When he found it, he slotted it into the keyhole and let Trouble out.

_They use key locks?_ Turnball Root _uses key locks?_ Holly thought.

Bobb led Trouble up from the basement of mansion and to the first floor bathroom.

Now time was of the essence, and luck could mean the difference between success and failure. Life and death.

Trouble opened the door wide and stared open-mouth in fake amazement at the bathroom beyond. Wait, maybe not. God, he's a good actor.

"It's _huge_!" he exclaimed. Bobb thought he was going to drool.

"Yeah, yeah. Just go! If I'm caught with you up here…" Bobb left the though unfinished, shoving Trouble into the bathroom.

Trouble slowly shut the door.

"All clear. No cameras, mics, even soundproof walls, ceiling, and floor. He likes his privacy, Turnball does," came a voice from beside Trouble.

Trouble turned to his right and looked at Holly. "Give me my stuff."

"You can't even say 'please'?" Holly teased, handing him the equipment.

Trouble left the question unanswered, putting the wings and helmet on, storing the Neutrino 2000 and buzz baton in their respective places. Then he and Holly shielded and flew over to the window. Trouble opened it and they soared out.

"And now, we get out of here. No doubt an alarm went off when the window opened," Holly told Trouble.

That's when she was hit in the back and sent spiraling to the ground.


	11. Overgrown Lawns and Neutrinos

**A/N: Rawr. Here you go, Chapter 11! About the parade rest thing, that's just going by what my chorus teacher said. Long story. I took the 'Code 14' part from when Chix took a hit to the wing in_ The Arctic Incident._**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in this story. Eoin Colfer does, and I am not Eion Colfer.**

"Holly!" Trouble screamed. Then his soldier instincts kicked in and he flew higher in case she landed on a mine. As he ascended, he vented his anger at Foaly (and Root, although he didn't know it at first) through his helmet mic.

"Code 14, repeat code 14!" he barked. "Fairy down. Fairy down! We are under _–censored-_ fire! Send _–censored- _back-up!"

"You already know Retrieval's on their way, Captain. Don't swear at your Commander, either. What a lousy way to kill you career.

D'Arvit. Root was there. Just what he needed, to swear to his dad, and commander.

"So tell them we're under fire! Don't you think that's something they might appreciate knowing?" Trouble retorted.

"I'll tell them. Just go get Holly and do your best to get hit. I don't want to lose any of my people today," Root ordered.

"Oh, I thought I was supposed to get myself killed," Trouble muttered angrily under his breath, diving to grad Holly. Louder he said, "Retrieval wouldn't happen to have a medic with them, would they? I don't think she needs it, but I can't be sure."

"Actually, they would. We expected someone to get hurt, though of course we didn't tell you that." That was Foaly.

"Foaly! What're they shooting at me?" Trouble snapped a shot of one of the guns (held by Unix) and sent it to Foaly.

"I'd say an old Neutrino, at a guess. Perhaps a 500. That's what Julius carried-" at this, Trouble heard his dad yell, "Don't call me Julius!" in the background "-at Holly's initiation. You had one, too, I believe. The pictures not clear enough, though."

"All the millions the LEP pours into your department…"

"I've heard that one enough. Now watch out, don't forget your carrying Holly."

"It's hard to forget," Trouble pointed out," when you're carrying a limp body, because she slowing me down considerably."

"Then let go."

Trouble almost did, in his surprise. "Holly, you're okay!"

"I was lucky enough to land in the grass, which is taller than me, by the way. I don't think Turnball knows what a lawn mower is," Holly explained, just as Turnball himself fired a shot just past Trouble's left ear.

"My guess is that he wants people to believe no one lives here. I didn't even notice it was so long when we first showed up."

"Holly looked below her to the tennis court where they had parked the shuttle. Was it still there? Holly had no clue, as they'd left the shields up. "That's because the tennis court is on a hill. I never noticed either."

"Makes sense. Now, can you fly? We still have to catch these three, and dodge their lasers."

"Let go."

This time Trouble did.

Holly fell a safe distance away from Trouble before starting her wings and flying up next to him. "Let's go," she said, smiling.

The pair flew up a bit, then down, and split. Holly went towards Turnball, but Trouble flew to the retrieval squad, who had just show up.

"That'd didn't take to long," Trouble commented.

"Nah, good shuttle," the pilot declared, slapping the hull. The communications array fell off.

"Yeah, real nice. Now come on!" Trouble commanded, taking to the air again with Retrieval One behind him.

Meanwhile, Holly was dodging Neutrino pulses fired by Turnball and Unix. Bobb was nowhere to be seen, no doubt in trouble for letting Trouble (and Holly) escape.

Unix fired a shot straight at Holly, who dodged right, then dropped straight down to avoid Turnball's next. Then she darted to the left, drawing her own Neutrino in the process. Still dodging, she squeezed off a few shots, not expecting anything to hit because of the movement. So when Unix fell, she was quite surprised. Until she heard a voice in her head.

"Holly, Retrieval's here, behind you. Don't turn around."

"I know Trouble. Geez. I'm not stupid," she assured him. "I assume who shot him?"

"Really? I think you're lying," he accused jokingly. "Yes, I shot him."

Holly managed to clip Turnball on the shoulder then, and he spun around, landing on his back on the roof. A Retrieval sprite zipped the cuffs on him and Unix. Now to find Bobb… D'Arvit.

"Foaly, help us out. What's the mansion built on?" Trouble.

Foaly did a scan in the Ops Booth.

"Good news. The whole place used to be one giant parking lot. At the edges of the property, the asphalt shows. Then there's that barbed wire fence around it… Bobb could be a few feet underground, in the dirt put down on the asphalt. But he can't leave the property without Turnball's access card, and then he'd have to go through the front gate. I'll do an underground thermal scan."

A minute later, Holly and Trouble heard his voice again. "Got 'im," Foaly confirmed. "He's sitting under two feet of recycled dirt. Not even a trace of clay. Anyway, he's buried two feet from the far left corner of the tennis court, provided your back is to the house. But if you go anywhere near there on foot, he'll know it. So have the place surrounded by flying fairies. All start digging at once, but don't put your feet down. You'll know exactly where he went under because there won't be any grass. I'll keep the thermal scan running. It'll take a while-" here Holly and Trouble groaned – "but eventually we'll get him."

Hovering above the place where Bobb was, Holly noticed something.

"Everyone stand back!" she warned, backing away. Before she could turn and take to the skies, however, Bobb surfaced from the bubbling dirt patch and shot her in the left thigh. With a softnose laser.

Holly went down. Again.


	12. Back To The Lower Elements

**A/N: Second to last chapter, and my story just kinda ends during the next. But I'm writing a sequel, beause I can't just let myself leave it. Anyway, I have 530+ hits, and only 10 reviews, many of which are from Holly25Trouble. Thanks to you, but it makes me mad. Please review if you read, tell me my story sucks, if that's what you think. I just want to know if people will actually read a sequel or if I'll be wasting my time. Thanks.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own the characters in this story (apart from Unknown). Eoin Colfer does, and I am not Eoin Colfer.**

Upon hearing the softnose shot, Captain Trouble Kelp whipped around in mid-air and quickly shot Bobb. He dropped like a sack of potatoes in the he, unlike Tree, didn't wiggle. While the sprite who'd trussed up Turnball and Unix cuffed Bobb as well, Trouble ran straight to Holly's side.

"D'Arvit, this is gonna need a warlock," he hissed, examining the wound. Something didn't seem quite right….

He carefully picked Holly up by putting his hands under her arms and lifting her, trying to touch her as little as possible so as no to get punched by a semi-conscious Captain Short. Sounds fun, no?

Once Captain Kelp had her 'standing' (in an upright position, being held there by Trouble), he carefully put her over his shoulder in a fireman's carry, trying not to touch the wound. Which was impossible, seeing as it was on the front of her leg, therefore against Trub's shoulder. Then came the fun hard task of bringing Holly to the shuttle where the medical warlock was.

Climbing down the hill, Trouble almost dropped Holly eight times. He counted. Fortunately (for them) Retrieval was not stupid enough to interrupt or offer assistance.

Trouble placed Holy on her back on the cot that had been set up in the shuttle, in case of emergency. He took three steps backwards, clasping his hands neatly behind his back, his elbows up and left foot slightly in front of the right, in the parade rest position.

The warlock looked at the wound, then at Trouble. "Softnose, you say?" Trouble had told him it was when he had come in.

"That is what I said. However, I may be mistaken. I did not get a good look at the weapon, but- ah, we do have the weapon, and here it is," Trouble amended as one member of Retrieval came into the shuttle, carrying it. He took the weapon from him and almost immediately realized how bad it was.

"Check for a bullet, doctor," Captain Kelp said. He was holding a softnose laser shell that had been adapted to fire Mud Men bullets.

The warlock poked around a bit more, causing Holly to scream bloody murder. Trouble quickly strode forward and squeezed Holly's hand.

"Holly, look at me. No, not him. Me," he prompted with a soothing voice. She did, and relaxed a bit, though not much.

"Got it," the warlock announced, pulling out the bullet carefully.

Holly screamed again and crushed Trouble's hand hard enough to break his finger.

He looked down at his hand. "Ouch." He sent some sparks down to heal the break after sliding it (painfully) back into place.

"I'm so sorry, Trouble!" Holly apologized.

"No problem," he replied, waving the apology away with his newly healed hand, before kissing holly on the cheek.

The warlock cleared his throat. "I've got the bullet, Captain Kelp. I can heal the wound now, but it will hurt a bit after. You may have a limp for a couple days. Gun shot wounds are hard to heal." Of course, he said the last part to Captain Short, not Captain Kelp.

Trouble squeezed Holly's hand once more and walked out of the shuttle. Finding the by-now famous sprite whose name remains Unknown (yes, that's his name), he handed him the starter chip to the shuttle he and Holly had come in and told him to find it, saying it may still be on the tennis court. Then he walked back toward the other shuttle, which Holly was limping out of.

"Holls," he said affectionately.

"Trubs," Holly kidded, limping to him.

Trouble's arms found their way around Holly's back and pulled her closer to him. She snaked her arms around the back of his neck and, eyes closed, their lips connected. A chorus of 'aww…' came from the on-looking LEP officers, but neither captain noticed. Trouble pulled away and checked his moonometer. "So. How about that dinner?" he asked.

Holly just smiled in response and he grabbed her right hand in his left, walking to the shuttle Unknown had just parked.

"Here," the sprite said, holding out the starter chip to Trouble and walking away.

"We'll go to your apartment first," Trouble informed Holly, "so you can change and shower, not that you need either. Then we'll go to my place. I just need to get out of this." He pulled at the shoulder of his LEP suit.

"But, unlike me, you _need_ to change. And shower, for that matter." Holly smirked to show him she was kidding.

"Hey!" Trouble protested, smiling.

"Oops, did I say that out loud?"

Trouble laughed and disappeared into the cockpit. A minute later, he came back. "Auto-pilot."

Holly nodded. "Nice shuttle. I wouldn't have even noticed you'd done anything if I wasn't in shuttles so much."

"Just don't slap the hull," Trouble cautioned. "The Retrieval pilot did, and the communications array fell off."

Holly laughed and sat down. Trouble followed her lead and sat on her right. Again he wrapped his arms around the slim elf, her auburn-haired head resting on his shoulder.

Before they knew it, they were awoken by Foaly's voice from the cockpit. Trouble yawned, stretched, and went to see what he wanted.

"Yeah, Foaly?" Trouble said to the centaur's image on a screen to the pilot's left.

"You're still on auto-pilot. You need to land soon," the centaur declared.

"Oh, yeah. I didn't even notice. We're almost back."

"Yes, sleepy-head! You're catching on!"

"Shut up," Trouble snapped.

"Moody." Foaly cut the connection.

Trouble sighed and sunk into the pilot's chair, putting the shuttle back to manual. Holly came in and collapsed into the co-pilot's chair and promptly fell asleep again.


	13. One Ends, Another Is About To Begin

**A/N: This is it. Sorry, it just kinda ends, and this is a short chapter. Sorry. Tell me if I should write the sequel or not. I'll later post some spoilers for the sequel. Thanks for reading! Oh, and no, I'm _not_ trying to make Trouble an abusive boyfriend.**

Now that he knew who his uncle was, Trouble felt bad about not being able to go to his recycling ceremony. But he'd been trapped by his _other _uncle.

When he had gotten back to Police Plaza, Holly was still sound asleep. He carried her into his dad's office, where he was told (while still holding Holly) that he and Captain Short didn't need to come back to work until the following Wednesday, except in the case of an emergency. A big one. After all, they had had a rough week.

Then when Holly woke up while Trouble was talking to Commander Root, Root told them to leave and have a good night. They went to each elf's apartment and both changed and showered. Then they went to dinner.

Root won 2,600 ingots when Unknown saw the two captains at the Italian restaurant. 25 fairies had bet him 100 ingots each that Trouble wouldn't bring her there by Friday, most of them on Friday. Plus, Foaly and Wing Commander Vinyaya both owed him 50 ingots. 27 fairies in all, and Root.

Following the collecting of his winnings, Root brought the money to the restaurant and gave the manager enough to cover Trouble and Holly's meals. He told him to make sure he said the meal was paid for by an 'uncharacteristically **(A/N: big word!)** happy elf.'

After dinner, Trouble and Holly went back to Trouble's apartment (Grub was with Chix Verbil for the night). Holly (again!!) fell asleep, and Trouble carried her up to his bedroom, laying her on the bed. He watched her sleep for a minute, and was about to turn and leave when he heard a soft voice.

"Trouble."

"Hey, Holly." He kissed her lightly on the lips, and said good night. As he was turning to go to the couch in the next room, Holly protested again.

"Trubs, you could at least sleep in Grub's bed," she whispered hoarsely.

He nodded and walked back to his own bed, lying down next to Holly, knowing that's what she really wanted. She was waking up.

Trouble took her in his arms and kissed her deeply. Holy reached up and started to unbutton his black shirt. Yup, he was wearing all black again.

Trouble put his hand on hers, stopping her.

"I'm sorry, Holly. I love you, I really do. But… it's to soon."

Holly nodded against his now bare chest, as he had taken his shirt off regardless. His room got hot (temperature-wise!) in the night.

"I'm sorry, I didn't really notice… I'm to out of it right now," Holly apologized. Apparently she was more asleep that Trouble had thought.

Trouble gently grabbed her chin and pulled her face up to his. His face an inch from hers, he hissed, "_Never_ apologize to me for something anyone would do." He said this with such venom in his voice and fire in his eyes, Holly was actually scared. Holy Short? Scared? Tells you something about how he said it.

Holly nodded, a bit frightened by the look in Trouble's eyes. They softened then.

"Good."

He kissed her softly again, and they fell asleep together, only to wake up to another crisis. So much for 'no work until Wednesday.' But that's another story for another day.

**A/N: Once again, that's it. Thanks for reading, please review, and tell me if I should make a sequel! Special thanks to Holly25Trouble!**


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